Published on Feb. 3, 2020 on Sports Illustrated
MIAMI — Raheem Mostert wanted to get off the field as fast as he could. “Once that confetti hits,” he said, “I am going to be really, really messed up.”
Mostert beat the confetti, but there were still clusters of red-and-yellow paper that players tracked into the Niners locker room after him, a visible reminder of how close this team was to winning the Super Bowl. The confetti is basically the same color scheme as the Niners’, so it wasn’t hard to imagine an alternative reality where they hadn’t given up a 20-10 lead in the fourth quarter.
Across the locker room, Fred Warner turns his back to the crowd, buries his face into a green towel and cries. He lifts his head up, takes a deep breath and then goes right back to the towel. He tosses the plastic Gatorade and water bottles at his locker onto the ground in frustration. Many of his Niners teammates sit at their lockers in various stages of undress, just staring at their phones motionlessly, thumbs too sad to scroll.
Nick Bosa throws his backpack over his shoulder and embraces a Niners staffer for several seconds. Solomon Thomas is struggling to answer a simple question. How do you feel right now?